Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Yo Hablo Espanol

So, we're at the allergist today, and by we're I mean me and Nicholas- the crazed, no napped, accident ridden, overly talkative, "ADD like", toddler who is a giant rash since it covers 90% of his body. This is our first visit and we were was going to last AT LEAST an hour and a half! I don't think that idea really hit me until I got to the parking lot of this new doctor's office and realized that Nicholas had on pants that didn't belong to him courtesy of an accident at school today and a forgetful mommy who neglected to drop off more extra clothes. I then realized that the shirt he was wearing was covered in CRAP- no, not literal poopy crap, just dirt and food, etc. the typical toddler school fare. And to top it off, he still had some serious marks from the self mauling he gave himself yesterday. Yeah...this was going to go well!
I started by SCOURING my van for pants...any pants...they could've even been Addison's and if they were better than the ones he had on I wouldn't have cared! NO SUCH LUCK! Then it was the search for a shirt...well, there were no pants so of shirt! And finally, the hardest one of all, the search for new skin to hide the gouges on the side of his can guess the answer to that one! So, I took my handy dandy wipes and wiped him down head to toe, although I skipped his hands and discovered that in the office! I wiped his face down about 20 times hoping to miraculously perform baby wipe plastic surgery and remove the soon-to-be scars on the side of his face. Shockingly, this did not work!
We headed inside and within minutes were ushered into the exam room- don't worry, I'm getting to the Espanol point! SO, the doctor comes in and seriously, you would've thought that either Nicholas or I had some serious issues with staying in one place- Oh, wait...Nicholas does! We finally settled on a spot on the floor and, yes, the doctor- whom we just met- joined us!
The next step was the scratch test to see what Nicholas is allergic to. The doctor drew a grid on Nicholas' back and you would've thought he was being entertained by the funniest thing ever- he loved it! Then the testing started...not so much loving anymore! If you're not familiar with this, there is a grid drawn some place on your body- for kids the back is best because it isn't really accessible to little hands. Then tiny needle-like "instruments" are dipped in substances that mimic common allergens and the patient is then pierced with each instrument once in a box. Each allergen has its own box. Nicholas had 19. It was not fun! You then have to wait 15 minutes to find out the results but in that 15 minutes I have a very uncomfortable toddler who just wants to sit down and hang out. NO SUCH LUCK! Their back cannot touch anything! So, I have the task of entertaining this child.....I mean my child!
We started off with the alphabet and counting and that actually worked for a bit. Finally, the last time I asked him to count he started counting in Spanish. I wasn't overly surprised by this considering his love for Dora, Diego and his teachers. He takes Spanish in school as part of a Spanish's pretty great! So, he's counting in Spanish, uno...dos...tres...etc. Nicholas counts perfectly up to Ocho....eight. Now, I know he can count to ten in Spanish...I've heard it....I KNOW IT! But he stops at ocho and immediately starts to sing Handy Manny....yes, Handy Manny. All of you Disney Channel fans will know HM. He's actually Fez from "That 70's Show" and he's a carpenter with these talking tools.....eight of them. When it's time to go and fix something all the tools dance around and Manny counts to eight in Spanish and the tools jump in the tool box and they go off to their job singing. Well, my son has abandoned nine and ten in Spanish for the rest of the song. I almost fell off my chair and the doctor just sort of looked at us....until I explained, of course! Yes, my son can count in Spanish but only up to eight and then he breaks into song! Can't wait to explain that one!
The scratch test came back with a SEVERE dander and inhaled allergen allergy so now Nicholas is on some more meds and we're going for X-rays to show us more information and of course some more tests. I've decided after the longest 15 minutes of my life where I did the Hokie Pokie AT LEAST 25 times and the "joy" of watching your child being repeatedly pierced with potentially dangerous substances, that Pat is taking him for the X-ray. Pat is not aware of this yet, I think I'll teach Nicholas how to say it in Spanish and then sing a song about it!


Kami said...

Hi there! Coming over to say hi from my blog. I think you found me because I found you somehow before and maybe commented, or something. :-) Stay in touch and lmk how Agloco works out for you.

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