Friday, August 28, 2009

Two Way or No Way

I had a wonderful night tonight.

I had a wonderful night last Friday night.

You are not going to ruin this for me.

I'm sorry we are not next to one another.'

I'm sorry I'm enjoying myself.

I'm sorry that I am going out and have good times and staying in and having good times.

You could be a part of it.

You don't call.

You don't make contact.

You don't make the effort.

I cannot do it all and I won't.

I will not stop enjoying myself simply because you're upset that I am.

Life is good.

Life is hard.

Sometimes life sucks.

Sometimes I just want to stay in bed and watch sad movies all day.

Sometimes I want to be boring.

Tonight I had a really good time and I won't allow it to be ruined.

You want to be involved and be a part of it?

You make the effort because I just can't anymore.

It's a two way street but for a long time the sign has been facing ONE WAY.

No more.

Two Way or No Way.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Something New

I'm trying something new.

Check it out if you'd like.

We'll see where it goes.

Friday, August 7, 2009

Refreshing

Every so often I get the urge to re-do and redecorate. Normally, I can feed that urge with a new picture frame or maybe a new tablecloth or decoration.

Not so much right now.

We are in the midst of a major overhaul at the Mountain Momma household.

Currently, it's disaster central. Crap. Is. EVERYWHERE.

My free time? Non-existent. I'm either painting, putting something together, hauling something out, bringing something new in or at Target or Home Depot.

And I love it. And it provides me with some great stories. Target and Home Depot are like sociological petri dishes.

Currently, I have 22 cases of hardwood flooring in my dining room, eagerly awaiting installation.

I have random pieces of furniture all over my house because they are either waiting to be picked up or I've just picked them up from one of my Craigslist finds.

I have paint cans in different rooms waiting to be shaken, poured and rolled onto my walls.

And plastic bins. Tons of plastic bins with little boys and little girls clothing in it waiting to be put in the attic.

Freecycle.org has become my new BFF and Craigslist is singlehandedly, along with a former MTV VJ, responsible for providing me with all new, custom, furniture for my living room.

And I love it.

Why the change?

We decided to do the floors because our rugs are G-R-O-S-S courtesy of our two children, numerous parties and lack of a good stainfighter. From there, it just grew.

We're at the point where we are no longer in survival mode constantly with our kids. We are starting to look at things as more than just functional and how can our kids destroy it. We are captives of the housing market but we refuse to allow it to keep us from being comfortable and happy in our own home.

So, we redecorate.

There is a sense of comfort and calm that overtakes me when I think about our new floors and our new furniture and our new bedroom. Like we are shaking off the past few years. We are moving forward and not starting anew but refreshing.

It's time. It's exciting.

But, God, my house is a disaster and all I want to do is make is stop being a disaster.

Patience is a virtue. I do not possess it.

But I do possess a number of good stories that involve Hipsters and Home Depot. And, of course, that former MTV VJ- seriously.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Exclusion: Size 2T to 3T

My evenings this week are being spent at soccer camp.

This has very little to do with the fact that soccer is not one my favorite sports.

This has very little to do with the fact that my son is LOVING soccer camp.

This has very little to do with the fact that soccer camp the week after vacation is somewhat of a letdown when you've spent the previous 6 days on a sunny beach down the shore.

This has EVERYTHING to do with little girls who can be bitches at any age- apparently.

As a child, and even as a teen, I was never really part of any one group. I was excluded and it sucked.

It sucked not being invited to birthday parties or random sleepovers.

It sucked having to hear about said parties and sleepovers on Mondays and beyond.

It sucked being picked last for certain gym games. (Rarely ever basketball because I was GIANT in grade school)

It just was not fun being excluded. As a result, I'm very sensitive to it now both towards me and towards others.

I try very hard not to exclude others, ever, regardless of anything.

I make sure that I teach my children the same thing.

I will not permit my children to be the kids that exclude other children.

To be quite frank, I'd rather my children be excluded than exclude others, or be part of a group that exclude others.

But I hate to see my own kids excluded- especially intentionally.

So, at soccer camp there are moms and dads and siblings that sit on the sidelines and watch as these mini aspiring Beckhams and Peles run around after each other and after soccer balls. They are having a ton of fun.

On the sidelines we sit and play with our cellphones, we munch on snacks and sip on bottles of water and juice boxes. We snap photos and send them along to dads who can't be there or grandmas who love getting pictures of their soon-to-be soccer stars.

And we try to entertain the siblings on the sidelines.

My daughter is unique. Every child is. My little red head will approach just about any little kid and say hello and then do a little dance or sing a song. It's really quite cute.

Last night there were two little girls who were right around the girl's age who were playing together- having a great time. I encouraged the girl to head over and say hello, and she did.

She walked right up to them. She gave them a big wave and big hello. She did her little dance. She smiled. She giggled.

The little girls?

They literally turned their noses up and walked away hand in hand.

I picked up the girl who began to follow and had her come and sit with me and her dad.

I was in shock.

I wasn't aware that bitch came in size 3T, but apparently it does.

We went back to camp tonight and I thought it would be different. Maybe these little girls just needed to warm up or something.

Tonight it was 'Ring Around the Rosie'. These two little girls- the same from last night- came over to the tree where the girl was playing and began to sing this little song/game. The girl turned to her Pop-pop and told him the girls were playing and she began to sing the song.

Logic dictates that the two little girls would turn to my child and hold out their hands and invite her into their little circle.

Uh, no.

The two pint-sized peaches did another round of the 'Rosie' and then the bigger of the two turned to the smaller and said, "We need someone else to play with" and looked right at my little red head eagerly waiting to play.

Then they walked away.

They walked over to their little brother, who was strapped into his stroller, and invited him to play.

I looked my mom and I believe my exact words were, "How the hell do they even know how to exclude someone at that age!?!? And so deliberately!"

"They have to learn it somewhere."

Exclusion is taught.

The only reason that exclusion comes in 2T and 3T is because it is learned from mommies and daddies who teach by example.

My dad, Pop-pop, and my daughter played a little 'Rosie' on their own and when the two exclusion twins came over and wanted to play they were welcomed.

I was never taught to exclude, I'll be damned if my children learn that.

Exclusion is not a phase. It is not something that little girls do because they don't know any better. It is not something that little boys do when they don't like the cartoon character on another little boy's shirt.

Exclusion is taught.

Exclusion is learned.

Exclusion is a family tradition that was never passed on to me and will never be passed on to my children.

 
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