Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Censorship

So, I just pulled a very angry post off of here at the urging of a good friend.

It was about my family, my extended family and if you'd really like to read it you can email me or find me on FB.  I saved it.  But in the interest of not starting a family wide war and not wanting to hurt feelings and again, being the bigger person, I felt it best to remove my words.

I hate that.

They were my real feelings.  I am really angry with my extended family.

Not my husband. Not my kids. Not my parents. Not my in-laws.

My EXTENDED family.

If I go any further it will be just as bad as if I had kept the post up.

It does bother me that I have to curb my feelings here because of who reads this.  And really, I don't think any of my extended family even reads this.  I keep feelings and words to myself because I don't want to start anything.  I don't need emails flying and comments raining down on me.  I don't feel like dealing with shit storm that could result  from some things that I have wanted to write.

And now I'm stuck.

I removed a post today and I'm not sure that I've ever done that before.  And I'm not sure how much I like the feeling that comes along that removal.  I've censored my feelings to protect other feelings and ironically enough, that's part of what the post was about.  And I feel like I'm doing that a lot around here.

And I'm tired of that. 

9 comments:

Huckdoll said...

Hey, I did read your previous post so I know what this is about and you have every reason in the world to feel the way you do.

That said, I once posted a topic that had to do with my extended family a few years ago and there was a huge shit storm and as a result and I pulled the post AFTER people I thought never even knew I had a blog, read it. It was very, very uncomfortable in my family from then on and I'm not sure things will ever be the same.

I do speak up to them more often now though ... might as well be the same person in real life as on my blog, right?

Anyway, from that moment on I drew a line. I blog about everything and everyone except my friends and family - immediate and extended.

I believe you did the right thing.

I wouldn't wish any family argument to be open with "I saw your blog post" on you; it's not a great opener, trust me. Better just to open it in real life, not online.

Brie said...

I didn't read it but I do know how you feel. I'm sure in the long run you will probably be glad you pulled it. I find when I'm really really ticked at someone I want to write back/call back and deliver the business.

It has been my experience if I sit and wait a good 24 hours - my head is a little more clear and I can better express my distaste for whatever is going on anyway...

Either way, I totally feel your pain. Sometimes I wish my blog were anon :)

natural girl said...

Having just been through a family shit storm ( had nothing to do with blogging) I feel that i can get it all off my chest here and I'm glad of that. I know none of my family or extended family even reads what I write.
This is my space to totally be me. I am sorry you felt you had to censor yourself. xxxx

Sandi said...

I got in trouble when I wrote about my sister-in-law, but I didn't give a crap. I hadn't written anything that I didn't actually already say to her face.

I wrote around the holidays about my extended family and honestly hoped they would read it because I loathe them, too and they know it.

I guess the lesson is, don't write anything on your blog you wouldn't say to the person's face.

CrAzY Working Mom said...

I agree with Sandi. If you post something, ya gotta be prepared for the "shit storm" that might come about. I don't blame you for pulling the posts to keep the peace so to speak. Sometimes it can be therapeutic to just get it out in the open. Taking them down must've been hard. But, you're taking the high road. :)

Mommy X said...

UGH, I totally feel for you and I totally hate that we have to do that sometimes. But just like Jen (Huckdoll) said, sometimes it is for the best. When my blog became more public there were a few posts that I took down just in case. I would say, though, if you need and outlet start a private blog that only has certain readers and spill your guts. Or feel free to dump on us, your blog family. Come over to my blog anytime and just let it out. I'll never tell. XO

darcie said...

It's tough - that *censorship* thing...the greatest thing about blogging is being able to pour out our hearts and our souls and via a little bit of feedback-knowing that we aren't alone - we are able to move forward...
Censorship makes that hard.
Hang in there.

Merrily Down the Stream said...

Hey Girlie! Sorry you're feeling punky about it - I caught it about comments I made about my mom from my sister (truly I could have been A LOT meaner) and it did not feel good. Then I wondered why I ever let family know about my blog. Lately I am kind of wondering why I do it (blog) at all. kisses

Miss K said...

It does suck and i have a new blog because of it. I'm sorry :(

 
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