"A Baby Changes Everything"

I'm not going to do a 2010 review because, well, I don't feel like it.  Part of me is indifferent to 2010.  The other part, remembers very little of it. 

I feel as if 2010 FLEW by.  And here we are on the cusp of 2011 with a whole host of new beginnings ahead of us and with those new beginnings comes bad and good. 

2011 promises to be nothing more than new and different and that is exciting and wonderful all at once!

What am I going to write about is being fat because, well, I totally feel that way.

We are beyond excited to be pregnant.  I am beyond excited to know that come August we'll have another new member in our family.  Someone to learn from and love.

That being said, it has been very difficult for me to go from being a triathlete to someone who has their exercise very much restricted.

Don't get me wrong, I have most definitely been enjoying these early stages of pregnancy.  I've been loving my appetite and my minimal all day sickness.  The excessive tiredness, that can take a hike, and the sore boobs....good LORD they can go elsewhere, too!

BUT as a result of restricted exercise and increased food intake, I have put on weight at a rapid pace.  And while my doctor is ok with everything, I'm not.  Although, I still weigh less than I did pre-pregnancy with my last baby.  So...I guess I should be a little bit more ok with it.

I want very much for me to not be focused on my weight gain.  I want very much to not think about the fact that I feel like I'm getting fat even though I'm pregnant and my doctor would tell me if it's a problem.  I want very much to realize that this is my last time around with pregnancy and I should be embracing EVERY aspect of it....even the weight gain.

I have been able to get to the gym minimally due to basketball season and work commitments and home commitments and when I do I am able to do about 30 to 40 minutes of low cardio...I barely break a sweat.  It's frustrating to have to stop running.  To severely reduce my weight training.  To take it easy on the elliptical.  I worked so hard to make it my nature to push myself very hard in exercise and because of a very happy occasion I have had to change everything.

It is, by far, the very best way to get me to learn a lesson that I will carry into August as we welcome our 3rd child. 

The Johnson and Johnson campaign had it totally right, "A baby changes everything."

The campaign doesn't mention how to transition into the change or deal with it.

Again, another lesson.  I've never had three children before and we'll be learning as we go.  Right now, as I bulk up in both baby and weight, I'm learning as I go and dealing, too.

If this is the worst part of this pregnancy, I'll take it.....and some pudding...because I really LOVE pudding right now!

Christmas Spirit

It’s interesting, a lot of what I’m reading lately is about the melancholy of Christmas and while I want to pretend that it’s not true and it doesn’t exist- it’s hard to do that.

I love Christmas.  I really do.  After Thanksgiving it is my favorite holiday.  It definitely is my favorite time of year- or holiday season.  There is something about the preparation that goes on during Advent and the wonder and amazement that flows during this time of year that has always made it a time when everything seems ok- for the time being.

It’s been a tough year.  As one blogger put it, “Not enough time. Not enough money. Not enough head out of the fog for me.” 

And it’s true.

We were all relatively healthy in 2010.  We had our moments of doubt where we thought bills wouldn’t get paid or health wouldn’t reign supreme, but in the end the bills got paid (late) and health returned and we were, as always, lucky.

But getting into the Christmas spirit- that overwhelming sense of joy and anticipation at the coming birth of Jesus- has been difficult.

My children are beyond excited for Christmas and there is recognition on their parts that this is about more than presents on Christmas morning.  There are discussions about Jesus’ birthday and Advent and the Nativity.  The meaning behind Christmas is alive and well within my children and that alone should thrill me.

But I cannot make the fullness of the season come to life as I would like to.  And should be able to.

We are so excited to welcome our third baby in 2011.

We are thrilled to have two children who are healthy and happy.

We are stronger than we have been and we look forward to continuing that strength and love.

But hurriedness, an ever-increasing stress level and ever-dwindling bank account sometimes weigh far more heavily on the heart and mind than those, and so many more, wonderful things do.

How do we change that?  Can it be changed?

A short few days remain before Christmas and then a few more before a new year and I’d like to be able to spend these days recognizing the good and magical rather than rushing through the necessary.

So, these next few days will be filled with baking and crafts and last minute shopping.  They will be filled remembering that this time of year is about family and children and the friendships that you can rely on and trust.  This time of year is about recognizing all of the wonderful that has been bestowed upon us the rest of the year.  This time of year is about new life- our own and that of Jesus- and how to embrace new life each and everyday and share it with those around us.

I wish each and every single one of you a wonderfully Merry and Magical Christmas and a Very Happy and Blessed New Year!  May 2010 end with you in good spirits and health and may 2011 begin and continue to bring you joy and good fortune!

The Last Time Around

It's been awhile, huh?

Big changes 'round these parts!

Let's just lay it out there.....my husband and I are pregnant.

HOLY SHIT!

We decided, a few months back, to just see what happens and, well, it happened!  And, wow, we're excited and pretty scared shitless!

So, yes, we're pregnant and we're due in August.  And the thought of being massive for the Summer months does not thrill me but the idea that I'm not using any maternity leave until school actually starts makes me VERY happy!

This pregnancy has been very different so far.

There's the typical stuff, I'm exhausted- like go to bed at 6pm exhausted.  I'm hungry ALL THE TIME!  My face looks like it belongs to a 14 year old kid.  My emotional roller coaster is on repeat.  And, HOLY CRAP, don't come anywhere near my chest!

But then there's the stuff that's kind of new....my pregnancy test was positive WAY EARLY.  I mean super dee duper early.  My previous pregnancies I was significantly late before I got a positive test.  My food aversions are somewhat different- last time I would have killed for a Tuna sandwich, this time the smell of tuna makes me gag.  Egg Salad and I are BFFs BIGTIME!  And my clothes?  Well, they're already snug and apparently that's pretty normal.

So, it's a new kind of normal around here.  A normal that we're getting to know quite well and that we're pretty excited about. 

I'm what you might call impatient so the idea that I have to wait until August to meet this child, that my daughter has declared should be named Cinderella Tinkerbell Dora, is quite difficult to wrap my mind around.  But wrap it around, I will, and I'm making sure to embrace this pregnancy.  To take it all in and try to enjoy it as much as possible because I'm pretty certain that this is the last one.