Christmas is Passing and I'm out of my Coma

I had a bunch of different things I wanted to blog about today and I'm not sure I remember any of them at this point.....hmmmm.....

Christmas was wonderful! The boy really enjoyed himself and all the presents that Santa left for him! Seriously...he had a great day. As did mommy and daddy and the girl! It was just such a perfect day. Totally relaxed, spent at grandma and pop-pop's house. Even the night before was really nice! We spent that at the in laws and it was also quite perfect- regardless of the fact that my father in law and his "girlfriend" keep their house at about 110 degrees! I can only hope that everyone else had as nice of a Christmas as we did!!

We woke up the next day and things went a little astray. The kids were exhausted. The boy slept in a bit, not too much later but late enough. The girl, on the other hand, slept in VERY late. We're talking 10am and she was still out cold. Finally, I asked the husband to head upstairs to wake her up. He had to rouse her from an extremely deep sleep. Now, I know there are those of you out there who are saying, "WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!?! A sleeping baby and you woke her up!?!?" Normally, I'd be with you. But it was weird. I had a really strange feeling. Something was going on. She NEVER sleeps that late....NEVER. So the husband brought her down and immediately I knew something was up. She was listless and completely out of it. I mean COMPLETELY. Even when we wake her up in the mornings, regardless of whether or not she's had enough sleep, she wakes right up and wants her bottle or cup and is awake. It was different. She was not waking up. She passed out on my shoulder- VERY STRANGE. She was not herself. She looked weird. She was cold and clammy. I had a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. The husband was kind of not paying attention. I called my mom. She said to go right to the ER. I called my pediatrician. I pressed the button that I NEVER push- number 7. It's the number that signifies that this is an emergency or doctor or hospital. I was connected immediately to a nurse. I described everything to her. Take her to the ER, I was told. Oh Jesus Christ! I knew it was serious. I knew something was up. The husband was still seemingly unworried. She just needed to wake up. Maybe so but I still had this weird feeling. The nurses and doctor at my peds office were concerned about middle of the night seizures- so was I. She's never seized before but who knows what goes on in her sleep!?!? So, we dressed and changed diapers and put everyone in the car. The husband made some snide comment about nothing being wrong. I yelled at him and told him he'd feel like total Shit if we brought her in and something was wrong. He apologized.

The ride to the hospital was agonizing. We went to the childrens' hospital by us which is about 40 minutes away. I did not take my eyes off the girl. I would not take her to our local hospital. I don't trust them. Sounds crazy but I am willing to "risk" the lives of my children to bring them to the specialized hospital 4o minutes away. As the right continued it seemed as if the girl started to come out of her "haze". She babbled briefly and started moving. Nothing major though. I called the ped back, maybe we just needed to take her into the office instead of the hospital. The nurse and the doctor wanted her brought to the hospital. They wanted her oxygen levels monitored. They wanted her neurologically examined. JESUS CHRIST! Again, this was serious. We arrived at the hospital, checked in at the ER and was almost immediately brought into triage and then immediately brought into the pediatric ER. (Any of you who have been to an ER know that this is very rare. Being brought in so quickly is RARE!! Regardless of how busy the place is, you almost always have to wait.) So, we got into an exam room. The doctor was in within 5 minutes. He examined the girl and it appeared that things were ok. WHAT>!>! At this point not only are the thoughts going through my head about how my daughter could have had a seizure in the middle of the but now I'm thinking, maybe I'm one of those crazy moms who brings their child to the ER for EVERYTHING- hangnail, extra poopy diapers, etc. I'm worried that the doctors and nurses are going to think that way too and therefore neglect some key part of my daughter's lacking health. At this point the girl is starting to come out of the haze even more. Still, seizure is still running through my head. The exams all come out perfectly ok. Looks like it's just an upper respiratory infection. Some mortin and tylenol should do the trick.

What a way to spend the day after Christmas!?!? I've spent the past two days on top of the girl. Worried that there is something still very wrong. I can't even begin to describe to you what those moments were like when the husband woke her up. Listless doesn't describe it. I could not wake her. I could not rouse her. I could not get her attention. She was OUT OF IT! She kept drifting in and out of sleep/consciousness. It was horrible. Seriously, horrible. The husband joked, when we were leaving the ER, that I'm never going to be able to deal with the kids being teens if I worry each time I can't wake her up. I laughed because he was partially right but I had that feeling. That horrible pit-of-my stomach-moms-only get it feeling. Dads generally don't get it. They don't always have that "connection". The husband wanted to let her sleep, give her time to come out of the haze. I wouldn't let him. God forbid. What if she had had a seizure? Who knows? In the time in the ER I thought I was crazy- seriously. She started to "wake up" and become herself. We left the ER and I didn't think I was all that crazy. The doctor was great. He had consulted with my ped. They both decided to just have us monitor the girl at home and watch for any other odd signs and signals. They didn't make me feel crazy- they let me know that my feelings were normal and that they were taking them seriously. The husband did, too. (After I yelled at him ;)!!) Thank God the day turned out well. The girl is fine, just a little sick. She was back to playing and having fun today after literally sleeping the day away yesterday. OUT COLD, most of the day. I guess she just needed a day to recharge and feel better! Mommy got one of those days today....

I had to have a minor surgical procedure today and I was completely anxious about it. COMPLETELY! My mom came up to drive me and pick me up and take care of the kids. I took my first ever Xanax and went in for the procedure. It was not fun. I'm in pain but I wasn't really all that anxious- that Xanax did GREAT. My mom dropped me off at home and took the kids home with her. (She's watching them tomorrow, too. I'll be working at Habitat site and they "frown" on children being on site ;)! ) Well, after she dropped me off that Xanax kicked into first gear! I have no idea where the hours between 3pm and 10:15 pm went. Literally. No. Idea. I told my mom when I texted her when the husband came home that I just came out of my coma. I was in a lot of pain but it was nice to get the whole afternoon to pass out completely. I was able to put aside yesterday. I was able to put away the idea that my daughter may have had a seizure. I was able to forget about the pain I was having. I was able to rely on a much needed afternoon of rest. Tomorrow is a new day. Tomorrow I head off to do what I can on a Habitat site. The Christmas spirit really isn't gone for me. I woke up out of my coma, looked around my living room and our tree looked more beautiful than ever. All lit up in the darkness of our house. It was lovely. Christmas is passing but it's not gone. That happy feeling isn't fading just moving into a new year.

That was all completely random but let's remember I have been in a Xanax induced coma for most of the day and I'm quite a bit of pain.......